The first recorded practice of taxes was in Ancient Egypt around 3000 BC. I hate to be the one to say this, but “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” This old concept is really fucking simple. Stop all this bitching about paying your taxes. I’m not going to pretend that I enjoy doing it, but I’m smart enough to understand the alternative and its consequences. So you don’t appreciate paying taxes to house and feed convicted felons? That’s cool. Let’s tear down the prisons and fire the jailers, and from now on DUI, larceny, rape, and murder carry only hefty fines. You get caught molesting little boys? No sweat, just pay your ticket. Why lock up killers and perverts when we can just let them roam free with the rest of us? I mean, that’s not worth any kind of money you want to pay, right?
I know most of you ignorant fucks probably couldn’t even find the United States on a world map, so I’ve circled the important part for you on this complex bar graph of income tax from 2005. Of course, this is just income tax, and doesn’t cover others (i.e. sales). But it will serve as a good comparison. To further assist you hairy apes, notice the average percentage for corporate tax in the U.S. is 10% higher than personal tax. You may also notice that the U.S. has the highest corporate tax in the world, just above Japan. Also, you'll see that personal tax in countries like France, Germany, and Belgium is almost twice as high as the United States, and their corporate tax is roughly half of their personal tax. Do you know what all of this translates to? Well, I’m no mathematician, but I think it adds up to: “stop your bitching or someone is going to stuff you into a small box and mail you to fucking Belgium, dickhead.” Again, that’s just my educated guess. Tea parties are for little girls and their stuffed animals. So just keep paying your taxes and shut the fuck up.